Saturday, May 25, 2013

I'd rather be doing math right now

Day 3 Recovery
WARNING: I'm so high right now on pain killers.....

I tried to go for a walk today.  I walked for about 20 minutes before I started floating above my body.  I thought I could go longer but it's not in the cards.  I have to remember to go slow with this recovery.

I'm on oxycontin and it is pure amazing.   Takes the pain away and makes me sleep. Sleep is the best thing in the world.   I wish I could sleep for a living.  If I could get paid to do nothing but sleep I would be CEO of Sleep, Inc.  I would be the most successful sleeper in history.  Sleep = good.

Here is one thing I hate.  I keep snoring.  My throat is so swelled that not only is it hard to swallow but it causes me to snore.  The snoring is so bad that it wakes me up from my drug induced comas.  I don't like snoring.  Snore = Bad.

Did I mention I haven't pooped in 4 days?! I have to take a stool softener with my morning oxycontin but so far I'm running on empty.  An empty toilet that is.  Poop = good.

I'm peeing my brains out too.  The only good thing about this is that at least I'm hydrated.

My dogs think I'm their own personal couch pillow.  Dogs = Heavy

This collar is bugging the shit out of me.  It's constricting and makes it hard to eat and drink.  Collar = bad.

One thing I do like about the collar is that when my shirt is on it makes my traps look huge!  Like some kind of Hulk. Makes me want to do shurgs when I'm healed up.  Collar = Hulk

1 comment:

Jen said...

Feel better soon Rex. I had surgery last Monday too....totally with you on a lot of that! Lol.